(Oct 14th) Persevering

I was given some responsibilities to complete tasks in Hope of God.
Praise God for all these.
I have always wanted to lead something in church (although I know that my leadership is not very, very good but what's impossible with God?)

First, I was appointed to take care of the bulletin board in church. That's not an easy work. Bro Bing Yi (who will be assisting me) and I have to decide how we put stuffs on the board that was already decorated months ago. But few days ago, God had spoken to me about it. He gave me some creative ideas on what to put on the board. I was very excited about the idea. And I'd start immediately.



Second, bro Bing Yi (who is my Art-partner) and I will be sitting down together to brainstorm about the upcoming Christmas event's decorations. Whose idea was it? The whole leadership team, of course. They knew that I am good in decorating bookmarks and Bing Yi in drawing, so they assumed that both of us are able to decorate the whole church but isn't that great? Bing Yi is a wacky Benjamite. I know we'll get along well as a team.

Third, as one of the Impact Ministry member, I was given a few tasks for the next Hope Malacca event "Family Cum Badminton Tournament '07". I'd to print out registration forms, create a poster, cut out cards for the marks, and also take pictures for the event. More art-y tasks for me! Wheee! I can't stop blushing when Sis Pai Chet kept praising me for my skill in photographing in front of Lemo and Richard. But honestly, I don't have any skill lar.

Before these...


As you can see that I am a very, very slothful girl. When I am given things to do, I'd not do my parts properly. I'll end up asking someone else to do them. For the last few semesters, I couldn't perform my duties in my groups correctly. My brains got 'rusty' and it couldn't go faster. I used to be so, so lazy to do house chores. When I am free for the day, I'd end up sitting right in front of my pc and do something. Just clicking and viewing some documents. Listening to my favourite music; just pretending that I am busy.


My pride caused a girl stopped coming to church. She was my sheep, Sis Wei Lin. I was happy at first to have a sheep. It shows that I am ready to be a shepherd. I always sit beside her and protect her if bro Paul comes to bully her. Sis Su Han was supposed to be the shepherd but she went to Korea, so I was given the job. Sis Shin Jie asked me to prepare myself to do shepherding but I didn't. Because I was not thoughtful. I never take the time to understand her. I didn't see how the future would be for her if she did not get any special care at all. As time passes by, I don't pay much attention to her. I wasn't a strong Christian yet. I always fall. That's why I couldn't take care of her. I couldn't even take care of myself.




It was also because of our language barrier. She speaks Chinese very fluently but I couldn't. She doesn't really understand English well. I am ready to learn but I have the fear speaking to Chinese educated people. I am afraid they'd tease me or give me queer looks. She stopped talking and meeting with the Benjamites. We tried calling her out for lunch or dinner but she wouldn't talk to us. She'd always hang up our call after talking for a while. Because of me, we lost a sister to the world.



The guilt in me got so heavy and I cried each time I thought of it. God had commanded us to take care of His sheep for Him. During prayer, I would ask God to bless me with a compassion heart for the lost souls. I don't want to replicate that mistake.

I wanted to fulfil the vision of Hope of God, which is "to build strong and biblical people to plant strong and biblical churches in Malacca, Malaysia, and all over the world". I like the vision. I want to capture the vision. I want to be the key man of a city. I want to share the good news. I want others to know how much God loves them and how much Jesus wants them to be saved. I want to persevere, as long as Jesus is with me. I want to build a church building - at least one in my lifetime. I used to be directionless but now, I know where I want to head.

I can see that He's teaching me to handle my tasks properly with responsibilities, guiding my heart so I won't get tempted easily, and also blessing me with Wisdom to manage my finance.
And I get all these by just



(Sept 30th) Flashback

















































Happy 41st Independence Day, BOTSWANA!









Happy 47th Independence Day, NIGERIA!
(October 1st)

(Sept 29th) The Obsession

I AM
FALLING
IN LOVE
WITH
.
.
.
.
.
COOKIES


YES, you read it right.
I had fallen in love with cookies. Not just any cookies but...



The fine taste of these fine cookies just melts my heart. I can't stop myself from getting obsessed with fine cookies. Once I had the fine cookie in my mouth, I love it at once. It is an expensive fine cookie but it's worth your RM. I could finish the whole packet in one day! I shared it with my mates and they think that the fine cookies are super delicious. I even recorded a video of them enjoying the super delicious cookies.

Go pamper yourself with these fine cookies for only RM9.90 in Jusco!



Note:
upcoming post would be all about Bible Conference and also the Mooncake Festival!

(Sept 17th) Love You

The moment I saw you there, I smiled,
But I stopped when I saw a cigarrette between your fingers,
I don't want to believe that it was you, standing there,
You turned your back and looked at the mirror,
Tidying your hair and also putting the cigarette to your lips,
I saw your eye... don't know if someone hit you,
I wished I could do something at that moment...



I don't know what to say to you,
I hoped I could ask you to stop immediately,
But I guess guys wouldn't hear me,
When I got into the cafe, my heart started to cry,
Tears rolled down my cheeks but you didn't see them...


I wished I could turn back time when you and I were still friends,
When you smiled happily,
When I could be there to protect you always,
Don't want to be in the pain I felt before,
If I only can be myself...


I'll love you more than ever

(Sept 15th) So Far So Good

So far...

I have been praying to God everyday asking for protection over my family. I have been keeping in touch with a special guy, David Harbor; my wonderful godbro; Le Jie, and a very best friend; Danny Chan. I gave hugs to my workmate; Ah Mei and mama Lyndy. I have been talking to Abraham more than before. I hear what I ought to know about people and I began to understand them better. I never fail to bully the two Quality part time workers; Wei Tong and Harry 'Potter'. I can't stop smiling when Hui Wen came to Tesco because of Xiao Qiang who is working there. I got Chocolate Ice Cream from Mr Ong who actually didn't owe me one. I didn't receive any annoying calls and texts from people.

So good...

I spoke Mandarin with most of the people there so that I can improve my mother tongue. I had improved in my 'chairperson' ability (remarks from Benjamites, thank you). These days, I couldn't resist throwing clothes into washing machine. I have been eating a lot and hoping that I won't face any gastric anymore. By the way, my cough's getting better! Surprisingly, I found myself obeying my mother's rule about getting home by 12am. And I started to fall asleep right after 11.40pm. Another surprise is... I have been offered to start a new care group with Abraham! So happy lar!

One last news; Danny Chan (18) is actually my childhood friend! Well, I just found out few days ago. He remembered my whole family plus the history. I was surprised! I couldn't remember who he was. His memory really good. I was excited that I couldn't stop smiling when I browsed through my old photo album... if it wasn't for him who actually talked to me first, we wouldn't have this friendship.


note:
My mother and Danny talked so much. They talked about the stuffs which I don't even remember. Sigh. I do hope God will restore those memories to me :)

(Sept 4th) Facts

8 Random Facts about Me

1) Each player must post these rules first. 2) Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves. 3) People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. 4) At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. 5) Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog


I am fat...
when I am 55kg (oh, I am 57kg now) .


I always dream to be an actress...
but I got so shy even acting right in front of my own group mates. sigh.


I love chocolate...
because it's every girls' love.


I love to eat...
when I am 55kg


I hate to exercise...
because it'll make me to eat more! argh!


I love shopping...
because I get new stuffs and feel brand new! hehe!


I love to work...
because of its stress. hey, it's better than to sit at home and laze around.

I love Nokia 6280, not 6288...
although they looked alike and have the same functions, the Nokia 6280 design is more glam' and it's so Finyx style ;)

BlOG'RS TAGGED:
DAVID, ALEX, CHEN NI, STEPHANIE, KIDROCK, CHAZZIE, CHOLIC, NIMRA

(Sept 1st) Sigh.

I am not supposed to come online today.


I am not supposed to come out with Danny.


I am not supposed to work today (changed of plans already).


I am not supposed to be SO FREE today.










And...
I am not supposed to miss the ride to JB this morning!!!!

I did put the alarm at 4am. I did wake up by then. I did look at the time.

And I turned it off. Sigh. I was so tired and I don't know why the alarm rang. Sigh. I woke up right after I heard the car's hon. Sigh. I was so upset! I wished I could make them to wait. But it's not a good thing to do. After all, I don't think the brother who is driving would want to wait that long. He called and I told him that I am not feeling well. I had cough.

I want to go to JB by bus after that. But I realized that I don't have enough cash with me. Sigh. I wanted to go with my mum to her work place but end up, my back hurts and my eyes couldn't open. Sigh. I wanted to follow someone out.

Thanks to Danny.
He accompanied me. Haha! He has to hear my rantings, my cries...

I feel so lost when I missed the ride. I mean, the Benjamites are there. And I am not. Sigh. I didn't see Sis Shin Jie for a very, very long time. Same goes to Khai Lyn, Abraham, Wee Kiat, Eunice, Jennifer, Charleson, and also the others. David Harbor, you too! Ben and Julian, I met you guys twice yesterday. Hehe.

I AM MISSIN' YOU GUYS ALREADY!

(Aug 31st) The Love For Her

As I drove out from my house to work, I listened to the radio. I heard that the DJs were all excited about Malaysia's 50th Independence Day which falls on August 31st. The radio station created some programmes that got to do with our National Day such as 50 hours of JJ and Rudy "The Breakfast Crew" on Hitz.fm. It's insane because we're going to listen to their omg-so-funny-lar jokes for 50 hours! Well, I'll stop grumbling since Malaysians love them a lot. I don't feel any joy celebrating that VID (that's Very Important Day). All I could think of is my salary. How un-patriotic. I am without income for a month already. What else should I think?

I passed the bridge near the General Hospital. I saw 2 huge printed flag nailed on the side of the bridge, this year's emblem and also the pictures of our previous and current Prime Ministers. I was truly impressed. Two weeks ago, the people from my housing district hung some little flags on strings around the entrance part. The young kids put on big flags with pole at the back of their bicycles and went around the neighbourhood 'promoting' our National Day. I don't feel like they're annoying us with the ringing and shouting. I wanted to respond but I held my hand back. Shy lar.

I saw many cars on the road when I walked out of Tesco. It was as if they're just returning home from work. Recently, I got lost in time. Please forgive me for I was a bit slow. I got so eager suddenly. I wanted to go to see the firecrackers! I want to participate in the event! I want to shout "Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!"

My uncle picked me up. I watched the people around me, together with their family, going to celebrate a great event together. The people from a racing club went around making noises with their bikes. The cars filled the places everywhere. The police were on duty to keep the traffic go efficiently. The little kids play with the sprinkling water in MPMBB Park. Their parents chatting with each other about where they were long, long time ago when our first Prime Minister declared our country’s freedom.

My neighbourhood was very serene and shadowy when I arrived home. I saw a young boy cycling around alone with no flag on his bike. I entered my house and locked the gate. My mum was at work while my brother was sleeping. I got on my bed and doze off the minute the sky was filled with cheers and explosions.

Happy Independence Day, Malaysia!





Currently Lovin'
The Click Five "Mary Jane", Kat Deluna "Love Me, Leave Me", Aly & AJ "Potential Breakup Song", Quietdrive "Rush Together"

(Aug 27th) a Week of Laughter Part 1

Missing me?

Finally I am back!

A week has passed and I am feeling great. For the past few weeks, it's all about work. Only work and church activities. But I am satisfied because most of the time I hung out with my favourite people (besides my family). In work place, there are the wacky mates who always make me laugh. In church, there are my shepherd, the Benjamites, and as well as the other church members.


Usually right after Sunday Service, I can't wait for JDMM on Monday (that's today). I feel so excited that I can meet my brothers and sisters again. The excitement grows when the church van arrives in front of the house. My heart would beat fast and I'd get stomach ache after that. It is weird. But I love them a lot, you know.

The post for today... is all about those who made me laugh real hard since last week.

Lazarus
The 'oldest' African in Hope Malacca. When we were in the van back to our house, we talked. He caught up with our Asian style of talking. With his own native slang, he spoke some Malaysian words like "Got car" and also "Can no not?" I couldn't stop laughing! He made me to realize how funny Malaysians talk.

Jameson Wong
The gay talk. One word. F.R.E.A.K.Y. It freaked me out so bad! He kept saying that he is one and I almost got fooled! I know he's not... but the way he said it as if he is. Earlier, he mentioned about the past and he laughed out REALLY loud. I was shocked. And embarrassed. He could remember every single stupid word I said...

Julian Foo
He always makes me giggle. Not only by his words but also his actions and laughter. Whenever I am with him, I can't stop laughing when he starts to say something. I can't wait for JDMM so that I could have the chance to laugh more

David Harbor
During CLS Fair on Sunday, I left my phone on the table. I was searching for it and I DID ask him about it. I almost cry out but I knew he took it. I had the feeling that he took it. His so-called "question mark" expression on his face really tickles me. His look was so innocent that I dare not 'accuse' him for hiding my phone.

Abraham Tan
Surprise or not, he's a witty guy. When I knew him last few years, he wasn't this funny. This time, he's a great brother in Christ. He made me laugh so, so many times! Sometimes it’s not the words that are funny... but his oh-actually looks are so comical!

It's really bad to laugh at people... but they are the ones who made me laugh. They always have something to say that will cheer me up. No wonder Abraham says that I smiled a lot these few days...

Note:
To Le Jie, I enjoyed the moments we worked together in Quality. I am so joyful to know you and taking you as my little godbro. You're a great person. Just have faith that you are able to do your Maths and I'm sure you'll get good grades for it. Thanks for everything, bro!



Currently Lovin:
The Click Five "Jenny", Tank ft. Selina "Du Chang Qing Ge", Boys Like Girls "The Great Escape", Tank "Fei Ni Mou Shu", Kylie Minogue "Red Blooded Woman", Gia Farrell "Hit Me Up", Ah Qin "Sheng Tang Zhi Men"

(Aug 14th) Around The World

Usually what I'll do when I get bored is write some stuffs at home. But now I am in the lab, online, doing nothing... ok, not exactly nothing but I am waiting for one particular person to online, and just... waiting!

GRRR!!!!
*cough*

Yes, as I was still waiting (I am still waiting), I thought "Why not I go surf my friends' blog?" And I did. Till I get bored of reading Malaysians' blogs. Then guess what I did? I clicked on "Next Blog >>" on top of the page and read some random blogs around the world. I read a few blogs from students in Sri Lanka and I am amazed by their captivating style of writing about stuffs and how they expressed themselves! I am impressed. Here are some links for you to check out:

these 3 are friends actually =)
` paan waati (you so have to read the birthday post)
` nimra (the girl filled with depression... sad but interesting!)
` john

After that, I began to look for more interesting blogs! Yes, I came to a few good ones as well but all about work... no interest lar, right? There's one blogger who writes his post just like how he could write in a book! His grammar is so darn good! Very, very good... I couldn't find his blog anymore, sorry about that =(

Ok, there's one blog that I read - wished I didn't - it's filled with... FILTHY words. If she could write a book about "My Diary of Making Love" and I am so sure she'd make million$$$. She could be rich and famous. Plus it's a f.r.e.a.k.y blog. Sorry to say that. Because it's ALL about sex. Only THAT. She poured out EVERY detail in the post. There are even a few PART 1 & 2!







God...

6 in the Morning

I never encounter that moment before.


I don't know that it was very, very painful.


There were no tears, only cries.


I was praying in tongue, asking God to put a stop to it,


As I hugged myself, feeling the sting even more...


I know I should have eaten last night.


I should have drunk something to fill my stomach.


But I was irresponsible about my health.


As a result, I have GASTRIC


It was very painful.

Too Close For Comfort

Imagine a stranger sitting beside you. He comes closer, wanting to sit near you. Closer and closer he comes. How would you feel? You feel like barking at him and if possible, kick him away. You don't like being glued to someone. I don't like that either. No one likes it. But when it comes to God... would we kick Him away? During preaching on Sunday, I was really surprised that what David Lai had said... is true. It's about "When God Gets Too Close For Comfort". God wants to interfere in my life but I didn't allow him to. I take matters into my own hands and kept saying, "I know what to do" and "I will plan later".

But honestly, I don't know what to do or what is going to happen in the next minute. I know that if I let Him in, things will get worse. Therefore, I don't let Him to deal with my problems. But as I am trying to avoid the problems, they walked into my life again. And then, I have to try to settle them once more with my own potency. Since I want to be the head, He allows me to. He sits down and watched me as I ignored His presence. As I am settling my problems, I kept on failing. I stood up again, but I fell once more. It was all because I said I know what to do. When you are the one in charge of the things we called "Struggles", you'll think a lot of stuffs. You thought of many solutions but you can't pick one. Your brains felt like exploding.

But as what God had said in John 14:27; "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid", I believe that when I asked Him to solve the problem for me, I will feel peace at once. I don't care about what solution He will provide me. I kept comforting myself that He will give me the best solution.

There was one time when I had this problem with PTPTN. I received letters saying I did not pay the loan back. I've forgotten about it till I receive the lawyer letter. I was so anxious! I don't know what to do. I quickly call them up to ask what I should do. This is the time I really have to let Him in. I prayed for it for a few weeks. God told me, "Write a letter." I felt so stupid for not thinking about it. One or two weeks later, I went to the bank to withdraw some money. I know how much left, so I don't want to check. But I kept hearing voices asking me to check. So I go verify. When the balance appeared, I was a bit confused. I stayed there for a while before I realized that... I receive the payment!

On that Sunday itself, I prayed to God that I should really let Him come into my life.


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