Too Close For Comfort

Imagine a stranger sitting beside you. He comes closer, wanting to sit near you. Closer and closer he comes. How would you feel? You feel like barking at him and if possible, kick him away. You don't like being glued to someone. I don't like that either. No one likes it. But when it comes to God... would we kick Him away? During preaching on Sunday, I was really surprised that what David Lai had said... is true. It's about "When God Gets Too Close For Comfort". God wants to interfere in my life but I didn't allow him to. I take matters into my own hands and kept saying, "I know what to do" and "I will plan later".

But honestly, I don't know what to do or what is going to happen in the next minute. I know that if I let Him in, things will get worse. Therefore, I don't let Him to deal with my problems. But as I am trying to avoid the problems, they walked into my life again. And then, I have to try to settle them once more with my own potency. Since I want to be the head, He allows me to. He sits down and watched me as I ignored His presence. As I am settling my problems, I kept on failing. I stood up again, but I fell once more. It was all because I said I know what to do. When you are the one in charge of the things we called "Struggles", you'll think a lot of stuffs. You thought of many solutions but you can't pick one. Your brains felt like exploding.

But as what God had said in John 14:27; "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid", I believe that when I asked Him to solve the problem for me, I will feel peace at once. I don't care about what solution He will provide me. I kept comforting myself that He will give me the best solution.

There was one time when I had this problem with PTPTN. I received letters saying I did not pay the loan back. I've forgotten about it till I receive the lawyer letter. I was so anxious! I don't know what to do. I quickly call them up to ask what I should do. This is the time I really have to let Him in. I prayed for it for a few weeks. God told me, "Write a letter." I felt so stupid for not thinking about it. One or two weeks later, I went to the bank to withdraw some money. I know how much left, so I don't want to check. But I kept hearing voices asking me to check. So I go verify. When the balance appeared, I was a bit confused. I stayed there for a while before I realized that... I receive the payment!

On that Sunday itself, I prayed to God that I should really let Him come into my life.